Who Our Daddy Is...

So today my girls had their first dance class.  I was so excited to take them this morning, however getting there was going to be a little different then what we were used to.  We were going to have to take two city buses as opposed to just hopping in our car and zipping off.  Needless to say my girls were way more excited about it then I was because they have done this before with grandma. Twice before actually, so now they are pro's. It's been about 13 yrs since I've been on any kind of public transportation.  So they were more than happy to guide me in case I got lost or turned around. Lol!!

My father has been a bus driver for the NYC Transit Authority for over 30 years.  He is highly respected and well known amongst his peers.  I find that when I get on the bus there is this certain attitude that automatically overtakes me.  I feel more confident. I feel like the bus drivers need to be nice and respectful to me because if not I'll be sure and let my daddy know.  I feel like a person of importance because of who he is and because  of my relation to him.

I found myself somewhat surprised by this attitude only because up until the bus pulled up I had been nervous about traveling by myself with my girls.  But as soon as those doors opened and I saw the familiar uniform, there came the confidence.  I started thinking about this in regards to my heavenly Daddy.  What attitude should I have because of my relationship to Him?

I should have an attitude that reflects confidence.  I should have an attitude that says, you know what it doesn't matter what you do or say to me, my Daddy will take care of it.  I should feel like a person of importance.  Because of Who My Daddy Is!

Now I'm not talking about Arrogance or Pride.  I'm talking about a Confident Lifestyle.  My confidence on the bus comes from my knowledge of who my earthly daddy is.  The knowledge of his reputation as a trustworthy and respectable employee and person.  I know his characteristics.  I know his nature.  I know his ways.   

Now as we get to know our Heavenly Daddy and understand His ways, His nature, His truths this same confidence will automatically overtake us. I mean I'm talking about Our Daddy who owns all the cattle on a thousand hills.  So we know our provision is Set.  I'm talking about Our Daddy Who says that by His stripes we are healed.  So we know we don't have to accept a single diagnosis of anything that comes our way.  I'm talking about Our Daddy who says that His mercies are new every morning.  So we know that just because we didn't get it right yesterday My Daddy in His love, gives me the opportunity to try again.  I'm talking about Our Daddy who says He orders our steps and knows the plans He has for us.  So we don't have to tread in fear because He will use it all to His glory as long as we surrender.  I'm talking about Our Daddy who can heal with one touch of the hem of His garment.  Our Daddy who is our refuge and strength and an ever present help in times of trouble.  I'm talking about our Daddy who speaks and it is done.  Our daddy who conquered hell and the grave.  Our Daddy who took on our sin and suffered a death no words can describe all for the love of you and me.  And we get to call Him Daddy and Abba Father.

What can He not do?  Whom shall we fear?  What should we be worried about?  How can we not be confident in the truth.  In the truth of...

Who Our Daddy Is...

Click Here: Be Encouraged and Remember Who Our Daddy Is

Stand Out...

Matthew 25:40 -  And the King will answer and say to them, ‘Assuredly, I say to you, inasmuch as you did it to one of the least of these My brethren, you did it to Me.’

First I just want to say I love our church.  We have such an amazing church family that has adopted us in during our stay here in the NYC.  This morning while I should have been sleeping I had the Tye Tribbett song "Stand Out" blaring in my mind.  I love love love this song.  Not to mention you can burn a quick 300 calories getting your dance on to it.  That's my jam. Lol!  But while Tye is talking about not conforming to this world in the area of compromising our beliefs and standing for the truth, the Lord kept hitting me with something else.  How much would we Stand Out if we truly reflected the love of Christ?

My grandmother was rushed back to the hospital Thursday afternoon.  It's been an emotional time for our family.  But what has made it easier is the love of Christ reflected through our church family.  The phone calls, text messages and emails of encouragement and prayers have been a true blessing.  But that's not all that they've done.  One member called me immediately after finding out and just prayed with me.  She, in the middle of her day, just dropped everything and just engaged in battle for my grandmother and for our family.  We both cried and prayed and cried and prayed.  I'm so thankful for her and the reflection of Christ love that she is.

Another one of our church members had let us know that if we needed her to watch the girls call her at any time.  It did not matter when.  Roger and I ended up having to leave for the hospital at midnight Friday morning.  So when we called she went right into action.  She got dressed and with nook in hand she was getting in her car at midnight (yes she had to work the next morning) to come and sit with our kids.  Just so Roger and I could be at the hospital with grandma.  The love of Christ.  

Another church member, who had been calling, texting and praying with us through out the day, called right before Roger and I left for the hospital and asked if we could pick her up on the way.  She wanted to be there with us.  I did mention that it was midnight right?  We did pick her up and she sat with us till almost 4 am.  Again, the love of Christ.

Another church member called Friday morning and simply offered to drive my mother where ever she needed to go for the day.  She sat with her at the hospital.  Gave my mom and grandmother some great laughs.  Went shopping for my grandmother.  Brought her a smorgasbord of food.  Then took my mother to run a few errands after leaving the hospital.  Once again, The love of Christ

But even in the midst of this all the phone calls, text messages and emails never stopped.  Still, The love of Christ.  I had many experiences in my life but this week will be unforgettable.  Yes, partly because of the emotion that comes with watching my grandmother transition  and being here to actually experience this with her.  But also because of the actions of the people I have listed above.  That's a life of surrender.  That's a life of obedience.  That's a life that desires to truly reflect Christ love.

I remember telling someone last week that I love how when we get out of church we stand in the street saying our goodbyes and kissing, hugging and saying our I love you's too each other.  The church is in a perfect location.  People are always on the street, standing on the corners or driving past.  They see all this going on.  The church "Stands Out".  Seeing the outpouring of love for each other makes them "Stand Out".  As well as the outpouring of love shown to people as the church members walk down the street and say hello and engage in conversation makes them "Stand Out".  The love of Christ is a life changing love.  That combined with the body of Christ in action is a beautiful thing.  So don't be afraid to "Stand Out".  We are called to do so.  Matthew 5:14-16 - “You are the light of the world. A city that is set on a hill cannot be hidden. Nor do they light a lamp and put it under a basket, but on a lampstand, and it gives light to all who are in the house. Let your light so shine before men, that they may see your good works and glorify your Father in heaven.  

So do not conform,  do not compromise but in all things Serve Well and Love Well.  A life lived for, and reflective of Christ will always...

Stand Out...

Honesty...

It's been some what of a rough week.  This past Friday, 2 of our really good friends from TN came to visit.  It was a very quick few hour visit while they were in town for a work conference.  It ended much too soon and I miss them dearly.  Then Saturday my grandmother was rushed to the hospital.  She could barely breath and was unable to stand.  Sunday morning started out as a perfect morning in that all four members of our family were ready for church with time to spare.  That like never happens.  Just for us to get downstairs and discover that overnight someone had smashed our car window in.  Then the migraines.  Oh the migraines.  That's actually why I am up right now blogging at 12:10 am.  I've been in bed since 9:30 but can not sleep because of the intensity of this migraine.  I've had one almost everyday this week.  I've found that it's been very difficult to take my thoughts captive.

I think I've said before that this blog is totally the Lords.  I blog only when He releases me too.  This blog has been very healing for me and this is one of those times for honesty.  I write to heal.  It's not my soul desire to have a lot of followers or thousands reading daily.  It's just whatever God wants.  It's only a matter of obedience to me.  This blog was started as a step of faith.  Today that faith feels a little shaken.  God never promised us that anything in this life would be easy.  He just promised to be there every step of the way.  I'm missing a lot of things this week.  It's making for an emotional week.  It's hard when God removes the familiar to launch you into something better.  Especially when the better part doesn't happen immediately.  There's still a little bit more of a processing time before the download of the blessing can be complete.

I can hear the whisper of the Lord saying hold on my child, I am here.  Don't give up.  You are so close.  I've given up so many times before and refuse to let go of the hem of His garment.  I'm just having one of those times where I'm having to fight to believe that this is not forever.  That trials don't come to stay they come to pass.  That He that has started a good work in me is faithful to complete it until the day of Christ Jesus.  That there is no condemnation.  That nothing can separate us from His love.  That I am the head and not the tail.  That I'm pressed but not crushed, persecuted but not abandoned, struck down but not destroyed.  Remembering 2 Corinthians 4:16-18 So we're not giving up. How could we! Even though on the outside it often looks like things are falling apart on us, on the inside, where God is making new life, not a day goes by without his unfolding grace. These hard times are small potatoes compared to the coming good times, the lavish celebration prepared for us. There's far more here than meets the eye. The things we see now are here today, gone tomorrow. But the things we can't see now will last forever. MSG

So I'm letting it go.  I'm going to rest in His promises.  I'm going to rest because I can.  He's given me an exit strategy.  He's given me a get out of the mind jail free card.  It's found in.  Phillipians 4:6 Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God.  Also in Romans 8:26 In the same way the Spirit also helps our weakness; for we do not know how to pray as we should, but the Spirit Himself intercedes for us with groanings too deep for words.  The battle is not ours, it's the Lords.  His shoulders are better equipped to handle it then mine.  So I think I'm going to let myself off the hook and plop down at the Father's feet and let it all go. 2 Corinthians 3:17 For the Lord is the Spirit, and wherever the Spirit of the Lord is, there is freedom.  Then get up and with the grace of the Father Move Forward...

Thanks for listening and allowing me to be Honest.  I'm attaching a song that has always always encouraged me in times like this.  It just reminds me of how much the Father is in love with me.  In love with us.  In everything He does He is screaming that He loves us and this song is just such a great reminder of that.  Be blessed.

Cory Asbury - Everything You Do (Remember, He's In Love With Us)

Go Get It (A Personal Conviction)...

So today's blog is going to be a little different.  But I'm realizing it's definitely an act of Courage  This one is about accountability and support for me.  I've struggled with my weight on and off for most of my adult life.  Once I had my girls that catapulted me into pounds  that I never thought I would see.  At my heaviest I was 345 lbs.  Today I'm 316 lbs.  Better but definitely no where near where I should be at 34 years of age and a 5'10" frame.  Health has always been important to me.  I am very cautious with what I allow my kids to have and both have always been a healthy weight.  But I'm realizing that most of their healthy living has been based on a do as I say not as I do situation.  I can and need to do better.

Over the last couple of weeks I've been hit a lot in my spirit with a desire to take care of myself better.  What ever the Lord has purposed for my life it should be a desire of mine to keep myself healthy to achieve every goal He has for me.  I don't want to limit myself because of my packaging. I want to go where ever and do whatever the Lord desires  for me.

For my family I want to be an example.  My oldest knows that I'm obese and she's always making comments that let me know that she is concerned about my well being.  I don't want to cause my kids to ever worry.  But I know that they are concerned for me.  Also I  miss out on so much because of my weight.  I don't take pics with them as often as I should because I'm not happy with the way that I look.  They run and play and jump and I can't.  I'm tired of that.  I'm 34 and desire an active life with my family.

On top of that my weight has started affecting my health in many different areas.  From blood pressure to inflammation to swelling and an increase in migraines.  I'm done.  I'm tired of being robbed of life and living it to the fullest.  So it's time to start making some changes.

Hence why I'm blogging about it.  I said in the beginning of this blog I wanted accountability and support.  Every 2 wks I will post an update as to my progress.  Once a month I will post a new pic for you to see my progress.  If you don't see a post from me I plan to hear from you about it. =^)  Now don't go into attack mode on me.  This is a process and not the easiest thing to do.  But I'm determined to succeed.  I've always said I want to be my most fit and healthiest by the time I'm 40.  I will be 35 next month.  The time is now.

For the Lord God is our sun and our shield. He gives us grace and glory. The Lord will withhold no good thing from those who do what is right. Psalm 84:11.  I'm standing on God's promises for my life.  I am trusting that God will honor my heart's desire in this and help me achieve my goal of a healthier life.  Understand my goal is not to get skinny.  It's for a healthier life. I'm pursuing health first.  The weight loss is an added bonus.

Here's a pic of me of me at my current weight of 316 lbs.  Along with 3 of my reasons for giving it my all.  My family.  With God's help, my dedication, my family and your prayers and support this will be my last pic posted at 316 lbs.  Whoo hoo!!  

Also anyone who wants to go for this with me I welcome you to join me.  We can support each other and pray each other through this.  

Go Get It...

Surrender...

So all day Monday the Lord just kept repeating the word Surrender over and over in my head.  Nothing came along with it.  Just that word.  I figured there was something the Lord planned on showing me, so be on the look out.  But it wasn't going to come in a way that I was used to hearing from the Lord.  I looked up the definition and realized it has a very negative connotation to it. To give up into the power of another.  To give oneself over to something.  Who likes giving up control?   Later on that evening the Lord brought back to remembrance a song Roger and I used to sing that we've not sung in a while.  The words simply say the following:

Where You go I go

What You say I say, God

What You pray I pray

I decided to look up the song to see why the Lord brought this back to remembrance.  The first line of the verse was the answer I was looking for. It says, "How can I expect to walk without You.  When every move that Jesus made was in Surrender."  Every move that Jesus made was in Surrender.  So how have I gone through my life not realizing that surrendering is an every second of every day part of this Christian life.  Ok God, you've got my attention.  What else?

I went to bed and at about 3 am the Lord just started downloading examples of surrender in my life.  I'm going to share them with you exactly how He showed them to me.

1. I've been a germaphobe most of my adult life.  But about a year ago because of circumstances in my life my germaphobic tendancies became hightened.  The more out of control I felt the more I felt a need to clean, disinfect and organize.  I didn't like it.  I said Lord, for who I am and who you have called me to be for the kingdom these germaphobic tendancies have got to go.  I was willing to do whatever it took to release this over to the Lord.  Shortly after the Lord brought a lady into my life who needed help.  She, like me, due to situations in her life had allowed her home to get out of control.  She had only let 1 other person in to see it.  I offered to come over regularly and help her through the process of physically and emotionally letting go.  I decided to surrender and allow God to work through me in the life of this individual.  Because of that the Lord has blessed me with opportunities to love on some that might be deemed unloveable.  They may not smell good.  They may not be the cleanest.  But because I surrendered this behavior to God and seized His opportunity to be released from it, I don't think about anything else but hugging them, loving them and being a representation of Christ to them.

*Surrender Your Self Imposed Limitations*

2. Last week I was sick, tired and the enemy just said this is the ideal time to hit her with  (reality). lol!! I wasn't reading, praying of seeking the Lord like I should, so I just hung out in the valley.  By Saturday things started looking up or I should say I started looking up.  On Sunday my Pastor asked me to give a word on the prayer line Tuesday evening.  Here's the deal I could have said no because I didn't feel spiritual enough because of the week i just had.  But all last week the Lord kept popping up the scripture Trust in the Lord with all thy heart.  Lean not on your own understanding.  Trust and Surrender go hand in hand.  I know my Pastor asked me but who was really the one asking.  God presented me with the opportunity and I saw Him in that moment, not my Pastor.  I looked at him and said Ok, Ok.  God doesn't see what I see.  He doesn't require me to know everything.  He doesn't require that I feel spiritually adequate to do something for Him.  He just wants me to Surrender and to depend on Him.

You don't have to know all the answers.  The answers you need will be there when you need them and the answers that are not given would either hinder you if you had them or scare you because you are not at the appropriate level to receive them.  If the Lord presents you with an opportunity, know that you are already equipped for the task whether you feel it of not.

*Surrender any beliefs that you need to have all the answers before God can use you*

3. Florida, Oh Florida.  You know the story.  If not read my past blogs and you'll hear all about it.  The Lord just reminded me about our 2011 journey and finally being at a place where we were believing God for our best.  Our move to FL was going to be the start of great things. But instead we ended up back in NYC.  Now you have to understand all my life I swore to leave NYC and never move back.  I have never been a fan of The City.  So it was a devastating blow to believe for my best and be hit with what I felt was my worst.  But I had a' choice to make.  I could have gone with the woe is me, angry at the world, everyone does me wrong approach.  Or the I'm going to create my own opportunity come hell of high water and completely take God out of the equation method.  Because I've struggled with both many many times in my life.  But instead I chose to Surrender.  I told God that I wanted to choose joy in this place.  I know FL is for some point in my life.  But it's not my right now.  But this is and I trust you and receive all that you want to do and have for me here.  And ya'll the stuff He's been doing and showing and growing and maturing and stretching me in has all been so so so worth it.

*Surrender your desire to have God's will for your life look the way you think it should look*

4. The last one concerns what I mentioned a ways up.  God woke me up with the 1st example of these downloads at 3am.  At first I said, "I'll remember it when I wake up.  Then I said, "No, I've been down this road too many times to not know better."  I got up, grabbed my phone and started typing.  I wrote down the first example, laid back down and about 15 min later the next example came.  I got up and did the same.  About 15 min later the same thing happened and I responded the same way.  I got my phone and typed. I didn't argue.  I was tired.  But why would I dare limit what God wants to say to me or through me to my time frame.

*Surrender your need for comfortable obedience.*

I'm excited about living a life of surrender.  I'm excited that God is introducing me to the me He desires for me to be.  The me that He see's.  Allow Him to do the same for you.

Surrender...
If you cling to your life, you will lose it, and if you let your 
life go, you will save it. Luke 17:33 NLT